BURGETTSTOWN, Pa. – Police say a western Pennsylvania man stopped at a bar and had a beer minutes after he broke out of a police station holding cell after his arrest on an assault charge. Police say they were processing Bonner and had removed his handcuffs and placed him in the cell. That’s when Bonner allegedly knocked the cell door off its hinges and ran away.
Let me ask something. Where is the first place you would go after you broke out of jail? Maybe the boarder. A safe house. Perhaps a shower, so you can re-teach yourself what it feels like to have privacy while naked. I don’t know, maybe something else. Not Mr. Bonner here. First place, the local watering hole, duh.
Here’s the thing. How many times do these prison breaks end in the guy getting caught? Like 1,000% of the time. This ain’t the movies chief. You’re not getting to Zihuatanejo to meet up with Morgan Freeman and Tim Robbins at the local tiki bar. You gotta wet your whistle before the bloodhounds get to you and rip you to shreds. Plus who’s not gonna buy this guy a beer once he tells his story about how he broke out of the clink.