I guess the mothership still has some funny left in them, because this was solid gold. Frank Caliendo mastered that Kiper impression. And I’m not even talking the look with the goofy hairdo that hasn’t moved in the last century, which was great. I’m taking the same mannerisms, same speech pattern, same agressive adjectives. Seriously, watch it a second time without watching the screen, he sounds EXACTLY like Mel Kiper Jr. Huuuuuge upside on these graphics too, I’m taking these graphics if they come, flying under the radar, for my money, these graphics are the best you can get.
Reuters – Washington state’s governor signed into law on Monday the final piece of a six-year effort to rewrite state laws using gender-neutral vocabulary, replacing terms such as “fisherman” and “freshman” with “fisher” and “first-year student.” The new gender-neutral references, for example, include “journey-level plumber” instead of “journeyman plumber,” “handwriting” in place of “penmanship,” and “signal operator” for “signalman.” “There’s no good reason for keeping our legal terms anachronistic and with words that do not respect our current contemporary times,” Kohl-Welles, the 475-page bill’s sponsor, told Reuters.
Really got to tip the cap to the feminist movement here. Big win. BIG! Because you know what sparks equality at a young age? No it’s not treating everyone equal in the classroom and in sports. It’s removing fucking words from the english language because they’re sexist. Makes sense to me. Can’t have kids running around saying words like “journeyman”, or “fisherman”, or “freshman” for god sakes. I mean, who could forget when Syracuse tried to parade around their mascot, an orange, as a man ? Orangemen? Yeah, I don’t think so you sexist pigs. This isn’t the 50’s. Try all you will, but the feminist see no hurdle too big or incredibly small they can’t win. It’s words now, but I’m sure high fives and fist bumps are next on the to-do list for these panty burning broads.
Seriously though, how batshit do you have to be to sponsor a 475 page bill about gender-neutral words? WORDS. We’re talking words here. Not to sounds like Iverson, but words? Really, words? I guess the feminist movement knows no bounds.
Update on that article: Thanks to military and civil engineers we get to keep words like “airmen,” “seaman,” “man hole,” and “man lock.” Score one for the home team.
Sager. So hip. Rip him all you want for his outrageous suits, but the dude knows his pop culture. Yeah, Carly Rae Jepsen, ever heard of it? Because Sager has. And it doesn’t matter if your Joe Schmo off the street or the best player on the planet. He’s gonna drop chorus’ in your face 24/7. Here’s LeBron, being all coy about his cell phone activity and how serious the playoffs are. That’s fine by Sager, he’ll hit you with a “Call Me Maybe” line and have you, and everyone else, laughing. Fucking Sager. And you wonder why this goofball in mismatching pastel suits has a job. Because he’s a professional and he knows his pop culture. Gotta love it.
I think it’s fair to say Russell Westbrook put dressing up like buffoon at post game pressers on the map last year. The guy had everything working. Nerd glasses. Urkle shirts. Short-sleeve button downs. Just ridiculous, on top of ridiculous, on top of ridiculous. So, here’s his first shot at repeating the Geek Chic movement. Decent start. He’s got the gold chain and glasses to complete the Run-DMC look. Wearing a sweatshirt that looks like they had the sleeves ripped off 2 seconds before he stepped on the podium. Make no mistake, this is just the tip of the iceberg for the fasionista that is Russell Westbrook. We got ourselves a looooong road.
No evidence or rumors have been posted any where. But I mean c’mon… Bubba and Charlize… this is pretty much all you need to see. Slick Willy just wheeling and dealing per usual in his post presidency. Doesn’t matter if it’s Monica in the Oval Office, or A-listers in their acting prime with boy haircuts. Clinton has game. The guy can go to any social gathering, sporting event, or black tie affair, and he just cleans up. So what if he was impeached, or 66, or still kind of has a wife. Game respects game.
P.S. Doggy’s gotta eat…
The NBA Playoffs kicked off this weekend, which means two things: players are actually gonna start trying so games are gonna be sweet, and the ridiculous post game presser attire is in full swing. So here we go, LeBron comin’ in HOT right out of the gate with this Hawaiian/floral get-up. Clean. Pressed. Slim-fit (or as slim as you can get for a 6’8 260 pound monster). Great way to start off the playoffs after they shellacked the Bucks.
TMZ – The arrests went down in Atlanta early Friday morning. Cops say they spotted Reese and her husband Jim Toth‘s car — a silver Ford Fusion — weaving in and out of lanes, so they pulled them over. As officers dealt with Jim, Reese allegedly started acting up, telling cops, “Do you know my name?” The officer answered by saying, “No, I don’t need to know your name.” Witherspoon then came back with, “You’re about to find out who I am … You are going to be on national news.” During Jim’s arrest, Reese allegedly became ornery, demonstrating visual and verbal frustration over how long it was taking to arrest her husband. At one point, she got out of her car and the officer ordered her back inside. When she got out a second time, he arrested her for disorderly conduct, a municipal ordinance.
Can’t really be mad at Reese for trying to use her celeb cred to get out of a ticket. This is what you do when you’re famous. It’s right up there with getting moved to the front of the line, free shit, partying with other celebs, and creepy stalkers. The thing is though, when the cop has no clue who the hell you are or your doofus non-famous husband, you’re kind of shit outta luck. I know, it’s shocking that this officer of the law isn’t a ginormous Legally Blonde fan, but you can’t win ’em all. Just let your husband get arrested, bail him out at the jailhouse, and move on with your day. Now you’re the one that’s front and center. Kind of an ironic twist on that little “you are going to be on national news” bit, huh Reese?
P.S. If she was still blonde when this thing went down… zero percent chance there would’ve been an arrest.